I hope I am Lucky

I hope I can really have this oppurtunity to go outstation and learn something. I know why soo eager. I am 23 turning 24 in a year's time, I dont have a lot of youth to run about and wat is important is that i have not really done anything that makes my parents proud. So I guess I better be lucky this time. Anyway fingers crossed.

I am really confused.........

Okay for what I know I like this guy, but he says he doesnt really like me. The thing is I am not asking him to be my bf, I just want him to be a close guy friend. Is there anything wrong with that. I feel really bitter about my situation now. Not that I am in tears or anything but I feel why is he doing that to me, Like u should really hurt me and let me be alone. But then again I think it feels better being like what it is now. I really feel happy seeing him. Not that i will be goo goo gaa gaa about him its just that I am glad to see him. Anyway I have to try hard to forget about him. Like really forget about him. Like to really dont wanna be with him. Its sooo hard......arghhhhhh this is starting to really frustrate me now. I am really confused on what I should do. Should I start getting close to him or should I just stray away from him. So confusing and decisions must be made before this thing worsen. When it worsen I will really feel hurt man. But I dont wanna wait for him. He is not worth waiting for, is he? this is always a question that I question myself every minute. Plz don't let come in today. I really dont wanna see him. I really dont know hoe to face him. aiyssssssssssss this is going to be though.

What is love..

Recently I have somehow create a fond liking for someone that I have met only twice. I know love is blind bla bla bla....... The thing is I dont love him, but I really do like him as a friend, maybe as a very good friend. I don't know if I should wait for him. He tells me so many stuff like there is this gal that has been waiting for him and bla bla.. but the thing is I don't really want to be together with you. I don't even know you. I can't even remember how you look like for goodness sake . How am I suppose to be with you. Yet you go like just be friends, I know you wanna give yourself space so that if one day you really do like me its not going to be a problem for you to go after me. Maybe I will wait maybe I will not. Once you missed the boat I guess other good ships might float along, but anyway you can see it as maybe there will be other great ships coming your way. In anyhow I am just a small boat. Ok enough rambling. I got enough of you. stop it already. I dont hate you. As a matter of a fact I need to thank you for being sooo nice to me. Thanks a lot. For the other person waiting down the road to actually pick me up, forget about it, coz you are not my type of car. Yes I mean move on. I will move on also to get some other different cars. Oh well thats all for now. Will update when I am free.